Taking control

Bear with me as this is this first time to ever write a blog. I may seem all over the place as I gather my thoughts here. I am four days into my journey to sobriety,

I decided to start my journey to sobriety on 6/18/18. Over the past few months I had been struggling with quitting. I knew in my heart and mind I needed to quit. I wholeheartedly wanted to, but the habit was stronger. I searched and searched, prayed and then prayed harder for the exact thing to help me quit. I didn’t know what that thing was, but I knew I would know it the moment I saw it.

I had celebrated Father’s day that Sunday with my dad and a bottle of Jameson like we normally do when we get together. No more than I usually drink and no less as well. Monday came in like a wrecking ball! I woke up late (4am comes fast), pretty sure I was still drunk, and scurried to get ready for work. As I drove to work the migraine set in. I already have chronic migraines without the help of alcohol. I tried to do my usual “hangover cure”, but that day my body was NOT having it. I proceeded to get the worst hangover I probably have ever had along with a migraine that wouldn’t and couldn’t stop throbbing. It was blinding how bad my head hurt. I ended up leaving work early, and leaving my co-worker to fend for herself, hoping she wouldn’t get slammed. I spent the next 12 hours throwing up, crying, eating, throwing up, crying more, and finally got my body to a point of total exhaustion that I finally passed out. During the midst of all that pain, it hit me! WHY DO I PUT MYSELF IN SO MUCH PAIN? IS THIS REALLY HOW YOU WANT TO LIVE YOUR LIFE? IS THIS WHO YOU ARE? IS THIS WHO CHRIS FELL IN LOVE WITH 4 YEARS AGO? IS THIS REALLY WHAT CHRIS WANTS IN A WIFE?

That is when I got online and started searching. Searching for books, articles, Young Living oils, Leaders in the YL community. Anything to help me. I came across a woman who is on her own journey of sobriety and in one of her blogs at the very end she wrote “…For those of you contemplating sobriety, I see you too. I’m here, cheering y’all on!” That’s when I thought, I don’t want to contemplate anymore. I don’t want to keep wishing I could quit. I want to actually QUIT! The next day I had off (yesterday), I got up, drank my NingXa Red, and started to figure out where to begin. I spent hours researching oils so I could be able to share any information anyone needed if they asked. I looked up oil blends for a few things that I suffer from; Allergies, Migraines, Anxiety to name a few. I decided that I needed to find something to fill my time that way I wouldn’t be as tempted to go to the bar or drink, so I bought 4 books. I am excited to see what I learn about myself and all that I am TRULY capable of!

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